When will it change?’ But, you know Things do change. ‘ When I was 30, like you, I was going, ‘I’m in a rubbish job, nothing good ever happens to me. That’s the worst one, isn’t it? I know what you’re thinking – ‘My youth’s over. We’re just cracking up, and people watching go, ‘Why is that funny?’ We tell them why and they go, ‘Yeah. We sort of read each other’s minds when we’re doing a bit of stick. I do gags as well I mean, good together by now.

So, um I’m more sort of character based, and he’s more of a gag man. Not Morecambe and Wise, because there’s no straight man, there’s no dead wood. – Oh, yeah? To be honest, I think you’re mad to let me and Finchy on the bleedin’ telly We’re like Morecambe and Wise when we get together. Innit, Gareth? You’ll only be able to use 20% of it when you get me and him together Gareth, innit? Hat. Why does that happen? Lock up your daughters, as thay say.

What’s the difference between your wages and your penis? I can find lots of women who will blow your wages. What did she get you? Something you can wear. My mum got me up at quarter to seven to give me a birthday present. What you doing in so early? Shit the bed? No! I haven’t done that for weeks! No. What’s black and slides down Nelson’s Column? Dunno. I have to make sure Finchy gets here on time for the quiz tonight. My mum got me up really early this morning togive me my present, Yeah, this is it, actually.Īnd that’s, I think, what influenced her into buying me Hat FM.

The office quotes from trivia